On the fourth Thursday of each April, more than 37 million Americans at over 3.5 million workplaces participate in Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. Tomorrow, April 26, marks the program’s twentieth anniversary. If you're one of those 37 million, make sure you do it right.
Originally called the Take Our Daughters to Work Program, founded by Gloria Steinem and the Ms. Foundation for Women in 1993, the concept was created in response to research that found many girls lacked confidence and were dropping out of school by the eighth grade. Ten years later the name was changed to ‘‘Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work’’ so that boys, who are subject to many of the same problems, could also participate.
“We want the kids, parents, teachers and workplaces to all help students see the value of their education by linking it to the world of work,” says Carolyn McKecuen, president of the Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Foundation. “Kids say, ‘I want to be a doctor,’ but they don’t always realize what it takes to get there. This day gives them the opportunity to learn and be exposed to their dream jobs. It teaches them that they have to start working toward that goal now, and that getting C’s in school won’t cut it.”
The day is also designed to encourage children to educate one another. “Teachers usually ask students to write about their experience or fill out a questionnaire and share it with their classmates the next day,” McKecuen says. “This allows each student to reflect on their own experience while also teaching their peers about it.”
Lynn Taylor, author of Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant and national workplace expert, says: “This day gives children and young adults a window into the real workplace versus what they've witnessed through TV, films or adult conversations. It allows them to see firsthand how adults serve a useful role in society; that there is a team fabric; and ideally, a sense of community. Equally important is the pride derived by seeing parents perform useful functions. It sets up a memorable and inspiring role model scenario for the value of work.”
The program is called Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work because people are encouraged to invite children other than their own to participate. “All daughters and sons should be able to take part in the program,” McKecuen says. Invite your niece or nephew, neighbors, friends or children from housing authorities and shelters. “Your child might not want to go to your workplace every year for 10 years in a row. In that case, ask a friend or neighbor or family member who has a job your child is interested in if they would take him or her to work.”
Since the suggested participant age range is 8 to 18, those at the upper end can get a valuable sense of what to expect during summer or part-time college jobs, Taylor says. “Learnings such as protocol, professionalism and respect for authority are the more subtle takeaways that these young participants may not otherwise experience. This effort also shows our youth how their education leads to a reward - not just in pay - but in terms of gratification and making a difference.” It's a reminder that the better educated they become, the more empowered and successful they'll be.
In Pictures: The Do's And Don'ts Of Take Your Kids To Work Day
Here are the do's and don’ts of Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work day:
Do:
- Think about how your child will participate in the day ahead of time, says Anita Attridge, a Five O’Clock Club career and executive coach. “Think about what you would like your child to see or do that day based on their interests.” McKecuen agrees. “Sit down the night before and talk to your child about what they want to learn that day and what they’re most looking forward to.”
- Talk to your kids before they go to work with you and lay out the ground rules, says Andy Teach, the author of From Graduation to Corporation: The Practical Guide to Climbing the Corporate Ladder One Rung at a Time. “Tell them exactly what is expected of them and consider giving them some type of reward if they behave themselves. Answer all of their questions; this is a fantastic learning experience for them.”
- Find out if your company or organization has any planned activities for the children that day, Attridge suggests.
- “Make sure you understand how to maximize the event from the national sponsor and your employer’s or department's perspective,” Taylor says. “There should be an office committee that can help. This event will be very [formative] of how your child envisions and defines work, so make it count.” McKecuen says the best organizations are those that put a team together to decide what to do with the day. It’s not a job for one person.
- Talk with other parents who have brought their child to the workplace to learn what went well and what they might have done differently, Attridge says.
- Invite your niece or nephew, neighbors, friends or children from housing authorities and shelters so that all daughters and sons can participate in the program.
- Taylor recommends looking at the day from your child's perspective. “Solicit input in advance for what they most want to see and why. Make it as interesting and interactive as possible, or the experience could seem dull.”
- Introduce your kids to everyone you work with and have them acknowledge your co-workers by saying hello and shaking hands, Teach suggests. Tell your kids what each person does so they can start understanding that everyone has different responsibilities in the workplace.
- While you want to make it interesting, keep it realistic, Taylor says. “It's Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day, not a trip to Disney World. Allow them to see you problem-solve and let them partake in that process; a valuable and empowering exercise.”
- Parents and their workplaces should contact teachers, if possible, to let them know about the student’s experience and participation, McKecuen says.
- Have another 20-minute meeting at the end of the work day to ask your child about what they most enjoyed and what they learned, McKecuen suggests. “Ask them to write a couple of sentences on what they’ll share with their class the next day. Give them examples or ideas if they need help with their reflection.”
See the "don'ts" on page 3.
Don’t:
- Don’t bring your child back to your same job 10 times, McKecuen says. “That won’t help anyone. Even if they are interested in your work, you need to expose them to other things.” If you have no choice but to bring them to your workplace each year, show them different aspects of your job or your company.
- Don’t place children in a potentially unsafe environment or lose track of them. Be specific about where you want them to be and what’s expected of them, Taylor says.
- Don't ignore your kids, even if you're especially busy. This is their day. “Make it special for them by paying full attention to them,” Teach suggests.
- Don’t just have your child shadow you; make sure they're engaged, Taylor says.
- Don't expect the day to go perfectly. “Plan for potential interruptions or changes in the plans for the day,” Attridge says.
- Don't let your kids become too hands-on at work, Teach says. For instance, don’t let them make big decisions, take important calls, or send work-related e-emails.
- Don’t assume your children are comfortable in your office, Taylor says. “You may not realize that it's very intimidating for them to walk into your world for the first time. They may be afraid they'll say or do something wrong, so take measures to put them at ease through some humor and lightheartedness.”
- Don’t bring your child to you job if it would be inappropriate, unproductive or unsafe for them, McKecuen says. “Sometimes it’s just that a younger child might not get anything out of it, depending on your job. But check with your company because some larger corporations have a separate program set up for the younger children so they can still participate in the day.”
- Don't have a bad attitude. It's important to be positive and have a little fun. Even if you're having a bad day, don't let your kids see it. Their impression of work could be molded by what they experience on this one particular day. It's in your best interest to ensure that your kids equate work with fun, so that one day they will actually look forward to getting a job, Teach says.
- Don’t admonish your child in public. “This could be traumatic because it's an [unfamiliar] experience to begin with,” Taylor says. “You want this to be a positive, memorable event that associates work with fulfillment, and the reward of education.”
- Don’t force your child to come to work with you if they aren’t interested in your job. “A lot of kids don’t necessarily want to follow in their parents' footsteps,” McKecuen says. “If that’s the case, have a friend or family member bring your child to his or her workplace.”
In Pictures: The Do's And Don'ts Of Take Your Kids To Work Day
